AN UGLY SECRET
Domestic Violence within the Church
Chuck Colson

A woman I'll call "Marleen" went to her pastor for help. "My husband is abusing me," she told him. "Last week he knocked me down and kicked me. He broke one of my ribs."

Marleen's pastor was sympathetic. He prayed with Marleen-and then he sent her home. "Try to be more submissive," he advised. "After all, your husband is your spiritual head."

Two weeks later, Marleen was dead-killed by an abusive husband. Her church could not believe it. Marleen's husband was a Sunday school teacher and a deacon. How could he have done such a thing?

Tragically, studies reveal that spousal abuse is just as common within the evangelical churches as anywhere else. This means that about 25 percent of Christian homes witness abuse of some kind.

These numbers may shock you-and they certainly shocked me-so you may be wondering if the studies were done by secular researchers hostile to the church. I can assure you, sadly, they were not.

Denise George, a gifted writer and the wife of theologian Timothy George, has published a new book called What Women Wish Pastors Knew. "Spouse abuse shocks us," George writes. "We just cannot believe that a church deacon or member goes home after worship . . . and beats his wife." Tragically, however, George notes, some of these men justify their violence "by citing biblical passages."

Well, obviously they're misinterpreting Scripture. In Ephesians 5:22, husbands are told to love their wives as Christ loved the church; beating wives black-and-blue hardly constitutes Christian love. First Peter tells husbands to live with their wives considerately. And the Bible makes it clear that the church has no business closing its eyes to violent men. In 1 Timothy 3:3, the church is told that when it comes to choosing leaders, they must find men who are "not violent but gentle," sober, and temperate.

The amount of domestic abuse in Christian homes is horrifying, and the church ought to be doing something about it-not leaving the problem to secular agencies. But this is one mission field where the church is largely missing in action. And sometimes pastors, albeit with good intentions, do more harm than good.

George sites a survey in which nearly 6,000 pastors were asked how they would counsel women who came to them for help with domestic violence. Twenty-six percent would counsel them the same way Marleen's pastor did: to continue to "submit" to her husband, no matter what. Twenty-five percent told wives the abuse was their own fault-for failing to submit in the first place. Astonishingly, 50 percent said women should be willing to "tolerate some level of violence" because it is better than divorce.

Advice like this, George warns, often puts women "in grave danger"-and in some cases, can be a death warrant.

Pastors need to acknowledge that domestic abuse in the church is a problem, and learn how to counsel women wisely.

Stay tuned for more on this subject-one the church has not said enough about.

Obviously, Christians must uphold the sanctity of marriage. But we should never ignore the dangers of violent spouses-men who use the Bible to justify abusing, and even killing, their wives.

Joyfully Home: What He Must Be Giveaway

Joyfully Home: What He Must Be Giveaway

Vintage Saints: Thomas Aquinas

Mark Driscoll

Thomas Aquinas was born in 1225 in his Italian family castle at Roccasecca. He grew up to be an unattractive heavy man who suffered from dropsy and had one eye that was much larger than the other. He was not a particularly dynamic man but rather an introspective, quiet loner who rarely entered a conversation, and when he did he would speak about something completely unrelated to the topic. Consequently, his college classmates named him “the dumb ox.”

Kidnapped

In 1244 Aquinas joined the Dominican Catholic order. His family was greatly opposed to his decision because they wanted him to become wealthy and powerful, not take a vow of poverty. His brothers kidnapped him and held him captive for fifteen months in an effort to prevent him from entering a life of ministry. Unable to dissuade him, their last-ditch effort involved sending a woman into his bedroom to seduce him, but he forced her to leave his room and devoted himself to a life of chastity.

Finally relenting, his family released Aquinas and in 1245 he went to Paris to study with Albert the Great. In 1250 he was ordained as a Catholic priest, and in 1256 he was named a master of theology at Paris.

Reasoning with the Greeks

At that time Christian theology was in great conflict with Greek philosophers, and Aquinas arose as the most competent thinker to address the interface between faith and reason. Many of the great thinkers of the day were enamored with Aristotle and his ability to explain all of reality not with faith and Scripture but with reason and philosophy. The growing popularity of Aristotle’s teaching was a great threat to Christianity on three major issues. One, Aristotle appeared to deny that a god made creation, preferring instead an eternal creation. Two, Aristotle was believed to oppose any concept of personal physical eternal life. Third, Aristotle seemingly taught that God only thought of Himself and was therefore not involved in the affairs of men or personally concerned about anyone.

Theology AND Reason

After carefully studying and writing commentary on a dozen of Aristotle’s works, Aquinas concluded that much of Aristotle’s work was misread by Islamic scholars and that most of his actual conclusions were compatible with Christianity. In agreement with Aristotle, Aquinas concluded that philosophical reason is based upon sensory data gathered by our five senses and that theological revelation does not contradict reason but exceeds it by providing insights to that which only God knows and the unaided human mind could never know otherwise. For example, Aquinas would agree that through reason and observing creation a person could reasonably conclude that there was a Creator, but apart from the revelation of Scripture one would never conclude that the Creator was the Trinitarian God.

The Reader

Throughout his life, Aquinas was an avid reader and author. Although he died before his fiftieth birthday, he produced more than ten million words in some sixty works, including eighteen enormous and dense volumes of theology. His penmanship was so poor and slow, though, that he dictated to as many as four secretaries simultaneously on different subjects. His surviving biblical commentaries include work on all of Paul’s letters and the gospels of Matthew and John, as well as a work called the Golden Chain, a collection of comments by various church fathers on all four of the gospels. His Old Testament works include a commentary on Job, a partial commentary on the Psalms (through the first fifty-one), and a commentary on Isaiah. For obvious reasons, Aquinas is widely regarded as the greatest theologian of the Middle Ages.

Summa Theologica

In 1265 Aquinas began writing perhaps his most famous work, the Summa Theologica, which means “a summation of theological knowledge.” While working on the massive tome, Aquinas had a vision that caused him to suddenly stop working on the project. Despite pleadings from his secretary, he never wrote again and spent the remaining months of his life in reported silence until his death in 1274.

By Pastor Mark Driscoll
Researched by Deacon Crystal Griffin

• Mark Driscoll's blog